I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
