But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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