The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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