did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Too much gin, very little bucket
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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