i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
our cab driver is having phone sex.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
