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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.

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• 

  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (315): View more from New York

  I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.

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• (323): View more from California

  Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not

  (818): View more from California

  Stop it right now

  (323): View more from California

  This time face forward

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (334): View more from Alabama

  He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??

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