You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
