Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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