In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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