I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
