Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
