Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
