Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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