i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
