Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
