I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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