I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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