Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
We talked him into tasing himself.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize