Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize