You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
