I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
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