Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
