Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
i out mim tonsoeep
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
