I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
