all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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