I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
