Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
