Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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