he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
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N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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