I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
