you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
