What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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