We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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