I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Randomize
