Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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