Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
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