if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
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