VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I think a kid would responsible me up
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
