thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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