Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
