Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
