She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
