Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
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