that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Be still, my beating vagina.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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