I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize