Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
