Soap is not a condiment
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
