just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
is it fun? or sober?
Pooping to opera.
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