Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Yo dont text me then not text me
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
