The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
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